twitter guy

As a designer, whether you’re freelancing or working for a company, you probably get to meet all kind of clients. Now let’s imagine how it would be to work with hardcore social media users…

The Facebook user

When you arrive at his office, the first thing that strikes you is that every wall has stupid stuff written on it. After a quick introduction, he calls you his “friend” and shows you intimate pictures of his closest friends. After that awkward moment you start working, but he constantly pokes you every time you look away from him. He can’t focus for a minute, always chatting or playing games. When you leave after getting nothing done, he give you a useless small gift.

The Twitter user

You meet him at the company’s front desk, he asks you to “follow” him in his office. As soon as you start following him, a little robot comes to thank you and offer you some useless marketing stuff. That kind of client only speaks in very short sentences, making it hard to express interesting ideas.

The FriendFeed user

If that guy organizes a meeting with you, he will organize five other meetings at the same time… and in the same room! The result is a meeting room with seven people talking at the same time, noone listening to others. Your client gained a lot of time, but nobody knows what the hell is going on, neither does he.

The MySpace user

Some weird emo secretary welcomes you by saying something like “h3Y d√úde LoLZ”, then she brings you in a black room with huge blinking boards. Some horrible hip-hop music starts playing as soon as you get in. That’s too much for you, you die of epileptic seizure before you even get to meet the client.

The Reddit user

He starts by asking you if you can code in Haskell, then lets you enter in the office. A gigantic statue of the “Flying Spaghetti Monster” is standing in the room. For some unknown reason, Ron Paul attends the meeting. The work gets done despite the amount of comments made by the redditor, but at the end of the meeting he kills you because you made a spelling mistake.

The CouchSurfing user

No need to move with this type of client, he settles meeting at your home. While you try to discuss work with him, he gets up and goes get himself a beer in your fridge. You don’t do any work with him, but he’s a cool person to hang out with.

The Digg user

He starts by asking you if you included the Apple logo and XKCD, then he calls his friends to ask to vote on their favourite projects. He explains you that he proceeds that way to be more democratic. When he’s done explaining, MSaleem enters the room and picks a project.

The Wikipedia user

As soon as you meet the Wikipedia user, he asks you to show the projects you’ve worked on. When you show him your work, he starts editing it Reference needed. His friends also come and all start editing your stuff.